Classical Winos!

Welcome to Classical Night on DWTS! Now, being that the Winos are not cultured enough to know the names of these classical pieces, we will instead give you the pop culture reference that they bring to mind.

Before we begin, let's start with our first wine of the evening:



Rodney Strong Sauvignon Blanc
Price: $8.99
Location: Bel Air

First off, Rodney would make a great name for a cat. This wine was a little 'meh,' but easy to drink and went well with our dinner.

Chicken Serenada from Trader Joe's and artichokes with hollandaise sauce.




The chicken was delish, as was the sauce--I mean, the artichokes. It was about this time that we wondered what poor soul was the first one to try and eat an artichoke. Did they try to eat the whole thing? How did they discover the heart??

Anyhoo, moving on to our classical pieces, we start off with Romeo's Paso Doble to the tune of Debeer's Jewelry commercial:


Sourpuss Kendra (who should be going home tonight), managed to butcher her dance as well as her 'mafia' ensemble. Did she get "Viennese" confused with "Venice" and think mafia attire was appropriate? Her dance was to the tune of Shawshank Redemption's prison scene:


Sugar Ray and his partner's awful awful dress (Disney Princess meets cupcake?) danced to something from the Nutcracker. We both believe the Fantasia flowers and mushrooms did it better:

(Doesn't that make you want to watch the movie again? LOVE the scene with the centaurs!!!)

Next was beautiful, skinny, perfect Petra and her dance to what we think was once in a Chips Ahoy commercial? That has yet to be verified.

Ralph and his amazingness did a routine to Romeo & Juliet...we couldn't come up with a reference for this one. But, we're sure Sarah's mother was sobbing during this performance.



Wine #2:



Loredona Riesling
Price: $8.99
Location: Bel Air

Our verdict?
Lindsay: I'm getting pear and vanilla....(picks up bottle and reads label)....No wait, peach and honeydew!
Sarah: Goes well with cookies.

Yes, our dessert happened to be chocolate chip cookies.

Is that a challenge? (We did consume, and survived. Nestle's a bunch of liars.)

Next up was Hines, didn't know his song either, but yowza her dress was HOT! And he was really good.

Then we had Chelsea, who danced to the Harry Potter theme. We were a tad slow to catch on...
S: Oh, he's a wizard!
L: Oh. And she's a wizard slut!
(These two are totally hooking up, right?)

Wrestler dude was rocking a porn stache and dancing to the Hershey's Kisses song. And holy tan-o-rexics!!

Finally, Kirstie and her shoe danced to what sounded like Bertolli's Frozen Dinners?

What did we learn here this evening?
Lindsay and Sarah watch too much TV.

Xoxo!